THE 7TH GOLDEN MOON AWARDS CEREMONY

THE LOCATION

Chicago is the place and the Golden Moon Awards is the event. Yes, here we are once again at the GMA’s ceremony, the meeting point for all the glamour of movie industry. Crazy Moon Pictures hosts the gala to concede its prestigious awards. The elegant Chicago Auditorium is this time the location chosen to celebrate a ceremony broadcasted worldwide to honour the best works of CMP’s 7th Season.


THE RED CARPET

From 'He-Man. The Power Of Greyskull', Josh Holloway
From the upcoming 'The Ice Princess', Cameron Diaz From the upcoming 'The Running Man', Mark Whalberg
Hillary Swank, from the upcoming 'Bullet Witch'

THE CEREMONY

As the lights of the stage turns on, an off-voice announces:

“Ladies and Gentleman, welcome to the 7th Edition of the Golden Moon Awards. To introduce the ceremony, please give a warm welcome to one of the main stars of this CMP’s Season: Mr. Owen Wilson!”

Instead of Wilson, Will Ferrell appears on stage. He is dressed as Captain Planet.

WILL FERRELL: Ladies and gentlemen, polluters and Planeteers! Welcome! By your powers combined, THIS is the 7th Quasi-Annual Golden Moon Awards! And I am your host…Captain Plan…

Owen Wilson walks onstage


OWEN WILSON: Sorry I’m late, I just had to… (stares at Will) Um…Will, what are you doing?

WILL FERRELL: (haltingly) I’m…just…welcoming everybody to this prestigious ceremony. I was just about to say what a magical evening this is going to…

OWEN WILSON: Why are you dressed as Captain Planet?

WILL FERRELL: Because I AM Captain Planet.

OWEN WILSON: What? No, you’re not!

WILL FERRELL: Uh…yeah, I am. I’m Captain Planet, star of the surprise multi-million dollar smash of the summer and face of a brand-new franchise! I’m sorry, I thought you knew. I’m kind of a hot property right now, what with everybody wanting to come see my movie, get my autograph, hop into bed with me…

OWEN WILSON: Oh…I see what this is about. Captain Planet – MY movie, Captain Planet – ends up being a surprise hit and now you’re jealous because you turned down the role.

WILL FERRELL: What? Jealous? No! Captain Planet does not get jealous.

OWEN WILSON: He doesn’t speak in the third person, either. C’mon, Will… give it up.

WILL FERRELL: (starts to cry) Don’t take this away from me, Owen!

OWEN WILSON: There, there, Will. You still have Lieutenant USA.

WILL FERRELL: (still crying) My character got thrown out of a window!

OWEN WILSON: Oh…well, then…um…I guess you have nothing, then. Tell you what – you can take over the power of Heart.

WILL FERRELL: (sniffles) Really? You’d do that for me?

OWEN WILSON: Of course I would, buddy. Now, on with the ceremony!

The off-voice introduces the different hosts.

BEST PRODUCTION DESIGN

This Season, he starred in two of the most successful movies from CMP. He proved his versatility playing a troubled husband in the drama ‘A Standing Eight’ and a peculiar presidential candidate in the musical comedy ‘Only In America’. She was no other than Valkyrie, the sexy and powerful female member of ‘The Avengers’. They are… Jim Carrey and Rose McGowen!


JC: I think it is unfair that a movie like ‘The Avengers’ didn’t get any nomination, Rose. It was a great movie!

RM: Same goes for ‘A Standing Eight’, Jim. Well, you know, some movies are unfairly forgotten when awards come, some others are deservedly remembered, like the three productions nominated for this category.

JC: And those three deserved nominees are…

3’s AND 7’S
ONE MAN’S HELL
THE DARK TOWER: THE GUNSLINGER

And the Golden Moon goes to…

THE DARK TOWER: THE GUNSLINGER

Cynthia Parker, executive producer of the movie, took the award and dedicated it to the whole team that made it possible.

MOST WANTED SEQUEL

He is the man behind the hair. Yes, Lobo himself lands in our stage with the beautiful company of the main star of one of next Seasons’ first releases, the thriller ‘Up And Coming’. Vin Diesel and Eva Mendes!


EM: I think you look better without all that hair…

VD: I know. I’m negotiating a shaving for the sequel of ‘Lobo’.

EM: And talking about sequels, here are the three movies audiences would love to watch a sequel of… despite ‘Lobo’, of course…

3’s AND 7’S
CHRYSALIS: PENNIES FROM HELL
THE MISADVENTURES OF HARRY FLASHMAN

And we have a winner…

THE MISADVENTURES OF HARRY FLASHMAN

Ed Willoughby, executive producer of the movie, took the award and promised that the sequel will be ready soon to hit the screens.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS

He has had a busy Season. First, he commanded ‘The Avengers’ as the brave and daring ‘Hawkeye’. But then he got in real trouble messing up with triads and mobsters in the breathtaking poker game of ‘3’s and 7’s’. He has also found time to be here with us tonight… Mr. Orlando Bloom!

OB: Some people has defined this CMP’s Season as the ‘Women’s Season’. Female characters, both lead and supporting, have had a strong presence in some of the most significant CMP’s productions of the Season. And the credit for that should not be taken only by the screenwriters that created those characters but also by the wonderful actresses that played them. Three of them are nominated tonight as Best Supporting Actresses…

Frances McDormand – VELCRO
Jodie Foster – LYRA
Michelle Pfeiffer – ONLY IN AMERICA


And the Best Supporting Actress of the Season is…

JODIE FOSTER – LYRA

Jodie Foster took the award. ‘I want to thank Josh Collins for the wonderful screenplay he wrote and Noah Baumbach for the excellent directional job he did with it. It was a honour being part of this daring, intelligent and honest project. And thank you, Jena, for being such a wonderful daughter…’, she said.

BEST VILLAIN

Some time ago, he played the father of the legendary Indiana Jones. And he will be playing him again in next Season’s announced sequel of ‘Dr. Jones And The Sword Of Faith’. She had a hard time struggling to survive in the claustrophobic world of ‘Monolith’. And we are all very happy to see them together here tonight: Ewan McGregor and Rachel Weisz!


RW: I love the villain’s award. I think building up a solid villain is one of the major challenges for any talent.

EM: Tonight, we have a mobster, a triad boss and the devil himself challenging for this award. Guys, you all made an impressive job.

RW: Yes, they are all winners for me. And they are…

Bill Murray – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND
Chow Yun Fat – FIVE THUNDERBOLTS
Russell Crowe – 3’s AND 7’s


And the Golden Moon Award goes to…

BILL MURRAY – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND

Bill Murray stepped on the stage and took the award: ‘I’m not sure if I’ll have any chance to come up here again tonight, so just in case… thank you, Harry Stark, for believing in my project. I feel very proud of having directed one of the flops of the Season! Just hope you keep trusting me for flopping again in your Studio in the future!’

The first music performance of the night: Duffy sings ‘Mercy’


BEST CAST

Another busy star during past Season. She starred in two different productions during Season 7: the comedy ‘Celebutantes’ and the western ‘Fortune City’. He joined the Wild Cards’ family in ‘Chrysalis: Pennies From Hell’. And yes, they are… Maggie Gyllenhaal and Tim Roth.


TR: I only want to say one thing: I want to make a sequel of ‘Sam & Twitch’!

MG: Ok, now it’s my turn then. I want to make a sequel of ‘The Women Club’!

TR: Once said so, let’s go on… We are here to honour the best team of talents put together in a movie. A good cast is not just a list of big names. It is a group of talented people that fit together and made believable and enjoyable the story to be told.

MG: And the best groups of talents that enriched the movies with their presence this Season are…

LYRA
MONOLITH
ONLY IN AMERICA

The Golden Moon goes to…

ONLY IN AMERICA

Chad Rutherford, cast director of the movie, took the award and dedicated it to all the crew and stars of the movie.

BEST STARRING COUPLE

She made her debut in CMP this Season with the comedy ‘Super Bowl’. He will return soon to CMP with another comedy, the upcoming ‘Night Cab’. An attractive couple: George Clooney and Katherine Heigl.


GC: Kath, whatever they say, I liked ‘Super Bowl’…

KH: That seems to make two of us, George. Just kidding… It feels great to be part of the CMP’s world.

GC: I won the first Best Starring Couple award. Since then, everybody thinks that Paul Giamatti and I were… you know, a couple…

KH: Now, everybody knows that this award is not only referred to romantic couples but to any kind of couple who has proved their chemistry on screen. Tonight, we have a man and a woman, two men and two women nominees. And they are…

Hayden Christensen & Evan Rachel Wood – TOGETHER APART
Kate Hudson & Frances McDormand – VELCRO
Shia Labeouf & Chris Evans – A HORSE WITH NO NAME


And the best starring couple is…

KATE HUDSON & FRANCES MCDORMAND
VELCRO

Both stars stepped up to the stage and specially mentioned the young stars that worked with them in the movie - Chloe Moretz, Elle Fanning and Agnes Bruckner - and dedicated them the award.

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR

Winner of the Best Supporting Actress for ‘Cathedral’, she made an impressive and acclaimed performance this Season with her creation of a vindictive newly wed in the violent ‘Damnation Road’. Ladies and gentleman, one of the most popular and demanded CMP’s stars… Charlize Theron!

CT: I was supposed to present this award together with Danny Trejo. But he couldn’t find his head on time… Well, it is a pleasure to be here tonight to honour three wonderful supporting jobs. The brilliant and talented nominees in this category are…

Bill Murray – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND
Kevin Spacey – MONOLITH
Woody Harrelson – LYRA


And the winner is…

BILL MURRAY – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND

Murray returned to the stage. ‘Ok, now it may really be the last time I’m here. So thank you to everyone who worked in the movie. Jack, you are a genius. Uma, I love you. I’ll wait for you to come with your statues to the press room!’, he said.

BEST SCREENPLAY

Ladies and Gentleman, be scared… He’s here and he’s not your friend... Darkman himself… Benicio Del Toro!


BT: I’m not that scary. I just had a good screenwriter. They are the ones who make us look scary, funny, lovable or hateful. They are the ones who make us look intelligent or dumb. They give us the words, they give us the life. And here are three good examples of brilliant screenplays that made possible three brilliant movies:

Josh Collins – LYRA
Josh Collins – VELCRO
Ted Froats – ONLY IN AMERICA

And the Best Screenplay of the Season is for…

JOSH COLLINS – VELCRO

Josh Collins took his award and congratulated Ted Froats: ‘Ted, take care where you are and remember… I’m not a terrorist, I’m just the guy who beats you this time…’

And the second live music performance of the night, a parodic original song about CMP’s Season titled ‘Fucking Captain Planet Only In America With a Dirty Mind’, performed by Sarah Silverman.


BEST ACTRESS

He won past edition’s Best Actor for his magnificent creation of Dr. King Jr. in ‘Dream Of A King’. Mr. Laurence Fishburne!

LF: Some times is hard to choose. Watching the wonderful work of the three actresses nominated it is so frustrating to know that only one of them will hold the statue tonight. Ladies, you all deserve our recognition for your talent and your screen presence. Nominees for Best Actress are…

Jena Malone – Lyra
Kate Hudson – Velcro
Uma Thurman – Life and Facts of a Dirty Mind


And the Golden Moon goes to…

JENA MALONE – LYRA

Jena took the statue and kissed it. ‘Thank you, Josh, Noah, Jodie, David, Woody... I love you. Thank you all!’, she said.

BEST ACTOR

And another winner here tonight. One of CMP’s favourite stars and past edition Best Actress winner: Kate Winslet!

KW: It is my pleasure to announce the three talented stars nominated for Best Actor tonight. A man with a dirty mind played by Rupert Everett. A man whose dream made him die, played by Jack Black. And a man who lived the misadventure of becoming a falling football star, played by Haley Joel Osment. Well, to make it clearer, the nominees are…

Haley Joel Osment – WHEN DREAMS DIE
Jack Black – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND
Rupert Everett – THE MISADVENTURES OF HARRY FLASHMAN


And the winner is…

JACK BLACK – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND

Jack Black hold the statue and said: ‘Yes, it’s me! I have won an acting award… believe it or not. I always thought I would make it for my wonderful performance as the freaky DJ of ‘Lobo’. But, hey, it’s ok to win it playing a dramatic character…’

BEST DIRECTOR

Pretty soon, he will release his first movie as director for CMP: the epic historical adventure ‘1066’, one of the big releases of next Season. And she already released past Season one of the wildest CMP’s comedies, ‘The Sex Monster’. Please welcome… Mel Gibson and Kim Basinger.


MG: Hey, Kim, you really are monstrously sexy…

KB: Thanx, Mel. I’m looking forward to watch ‘1066’. Good luck!

MG: Hope you like it! Let’s go with the nominees for Best Director. They are…

Bill Murray – LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND
Cameron Crowe – ONLY IN AMERICA
Noah Baumbach – LYRA


Come and get your award Mr…

CAMERON CROWE – ONLY IN AMERICA

Cameron Crowe took his award and dedicated it to his family and to all the people involved in making the movie possible.

BEST PICTURE

He knows well how to produce a blockbuster. He has already won the Best Picture award for ‘Star Wars: New Order’. He is the man behind Star Wars, Game Boy and lately The Legend Of Zelda. He is no other than George Lucas!



GL: It has been a wonderful CMP’s Season. I think the Studio may feel very proud for the great team of writers, actors, directors and producers that have made possible this thrilling Season. And one of the thirty movies released will get the recognition of this award. The movies nominees for Best Picture of CMP’s Season 7 are…

LIFE AND FACTS OF A DIRTY MIND
LYRA
ONLY IN AMERICA

And the Best Picture winner is…

ONLY IN AMERICA

Cameron Crowe and producer Ryan Singleton came up to the stage and embraced before acknowledging the splendid work of all the crew and stars that worked so hard to make ‘Only In America’ a hit beyond any of their expectations.

AND THAT’S ALL FOR THIS SEASON… !!!

SEE YOU ALL AT THE NEXT GOLDEN MOON AWARDS CEREMONY… SOMEWHERE IN THE WORLD!

THE PRESS ROOM

Best Starring Couple, Kate Hudson & Frances McDormand

Best Supporting Actress, Jodie Foster

Best Villain and Best Supporting Actor, Bill Murray

Best Actress, Jena Malone

Best Actor, Jack Black

THE HALL OF FAME